Starting the Conversation

Navigating mental health conversations with your child

In today’s fast-paced and increasingly complex world, children and teens face so many challenges that can impact their mental health. As parents, we naturally want to protect our children from harm, but it's equally important to equip them with the tools and support they need to navigate their emotional and psychological well-being.

One of the most effective ways to do this is through open, honest, and age-appropriate conversations about mental health. However, talking to your child about their mental health can feel daunting, especially if you’re unsure where to start! In this guide, we’ll explore strategies for initiating these conversations and tips for fostering a supportive environment where your child feels comfortable discussing their feelings.

1. Start Early and Make It Normal

Mental health is an integral part of overall health, and discussing it shouldn’t be reserved for moments of crisis. By introducing the topic early, you normalise these conversations and help your child understand that their mental health is just as important as their physical health.

How to Begin:

  • Integrate Mental Health into Daily Conversations: You might start by talking about feelings and emotions in everyday situations. For example, “You seem upset today. Do you want to talk about what’s bothering you?” or “How did you feel after your presentation at school?”

  • Use Age-Appropriate Language: For younger children, use simple terms like “happy,” “sad,” “scared,” or “angry.” As your child grows, you can introduce more complex concepts like anxiety, stress, or depression. 

  • Model Open Communication: Share your own feelings in an appropriate manner. Saying things like, “I felt really stressed today because I had a lot of work to do,” shows your child that it’s okay to talk about emotions.

2. Choose the Right Moment

Timing is crucial when discussing sensitive topics like mental health. Choose a moment when your child is calm, and there are minimal distractions. It’s often easier for children to open up when they feel relaxed and safe.

Finding the Right Time:

  • Casual Settings: Conversations often flow more naturally during routine activities like driving, walking, or cooking together. These settings can feel less intimidating for children.

  • Private and Quiet Moments: Ensure the conversation happens in a private setting where your child feels secure and free to express themselves without fear of judgement or interruption.

3. Listen More Than You Talk

One of the most important aspects of talking about mental health is listening. Children may struggle to articulate their feelings, and it’s essential to give them space to express themselves at their own pace.

Effective Listening Tips:

  • Be Patient: Don’t rush your child to talk or provide immediate solutions. Sometimes, just being there and listening is enough.

  • Reflect Back What You Hear: This shows your child that you are truly listening and understanding their feelings. For example, “It sounds like you’re feeling really stressed about school. Is that right?”

  • Avoid Interrupting or Judging: Let your child finish their thoughts before you respond. Avoid dismissing their feelings or offering solutions too quickly.

4. Validate Their Feelings

It’s important for children to know that their feelings are valid and that it’s okay to feel whatever they’re feeling. Validation helps to build trust and encourages your child to continue sharing their thoughts and emotions with you.

How to Validate:

  • Acknowledge Their Emotions: Use phrases like, “I can see that you’re really upset about this,” or “It’s okay to feel scared sometimes.”

  • Avoid Minimising Their Feelings: Refrain from saying things like, “It’s not a big deal,” or “You’ll get over it.” Instead, acknowledge their emotions and provide reassurance that you’re there to support them.

5. Provide Reassurance and Support

Talking about mental health can be scary for children, especially if they’re experiencing difficult emotions or symptoms they don’t understand. Reassuring your child that they are not alone and that help is available can be incredibly comforting.

Offering Reassurance:

  • Express Unconditional Support: Let your child know that you are there for them no matter what. You might say, “I’m here for you, and we’ll get through this together.”

  • Normalise Seeking Help: If your child is struggling, reassure them that it’s okay to seek help from a professional, just like they would if they had a physical health issue. You can say, “It’s really strong and brave to ask for help when you need it.”

6. Educate Them About Mental Health

Providing your child with age-appropriate information about mental health can empower them to understand their own experiences better and reduce any stigma they may feel.

Educating Your Child:

  • Explain Mental Health in Simple Terms: For younger children, you might say, “Mental health is about how we think, feel, and act. Just like our bodies can get sick, our minds can sometimes feel unwell too.”

  • Discuss Common Mental Health Issues: As your child gets older, you can explain more specific issues like anxiety or depression, emphasising that these are common and treatable.

  • Use Resources: Books, videos, and online resources can be helpful tools in explaining mental health concepts to children. Choose materials that are age-appropriate and relatable.

7. Encourage Open Communication

Create an environment where your child feels comfortable coming to you with their concerns. Encourage regular check-ins about their emotional well-being and make it clear that they can talk to you about anything.

Fostering Open Communication:

  • Regular Check-Ins: Make it a habit to ask your child how they’re feeling, both physically and emotionally. This could be a daily or weekly routine, depending on what feels natural for your family.

  • Be Approachable: Ensure your child knows they can come to you with any concerns, big or small. Reinforce that you’re always there to listen and support them.

  • Create a Safe Space: Encourage your child to express their feelings without fear of punishment or ridicule. Let them know that all emotions are valid and worth discussing.

8. Know When to Seek Professional Help

While open communication is crucial, it’s also important to recognize when your child may need additional support from a mental health professional. Knowing the signs that indicate it’s time to seek help can make a significant difference in your child’s well-being.

When to Consider Professional Help:

  • Persistent Changes in Behavior: If your child exhibits significant changes in behavior, mood, or performance at school that last for more than a few weeks, it may be time to seek professional advice.

  • Signs of Anxiety or Depression: Symptoms such as excessive worry, withdrawal from activities, changes in sleep patterns, or expressions of hopelessness should be taken seriously.

  • Your Own Instincts: As a parent, trust your instincts. If you feel that something isn’t right, it’s better to consult a professional sooner rather than later.


Talking to your child about their mental health is one of the most valuable things you can do as a parent. By starting early, choosing the right moments, listening actively, and providing reassurance, you create a foundation of trust and support that will serve your child throughout their life. Remember, it’s okay to seek help if you’re unsure how to approach these conversations or if your child’s needs go beyond what you can provide at home. Together, with open communication and professional support when needed, you can help your child navigate the complexities of their mental and emotional well-being with confidence and resilience.

Stay connected with us on our socials (Facebook and Instagram) for more information, tips, and resources about raising a healthy, happy family. If you’d like to learn more about our services or schedule an appointment, feel free to get in touch - we’d love to hear from you!

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